Sunday, April 4, 2010

Let's celebrate the year of equilibrium!

That doesn't sound like a kid-focused title for a mother to pay tribute to her daughter as she turns 8. Of course, I'm happy to celebrate this milestone in a bittersweet way - I struck by how fast Julia is growing up, but also look forward to some more even-keeled moments during this even year ahead. Let me explain.

I went to a parenting seminar a few years back and was told that kids go through these cycles of equilibrium and disequilibrium which for a period coincide with even ages (2,4,6 and yeah! now 8) being the even-keeled years and odd ages (3, 5, and lately, the not-so-lucky 7) being not so much. Julia's behaviour and disposition has fit this cycle completely. This past year of being seven has been a struggle at times as I often shook my head, sighed, cursed and fumed at the moody teenager I now had to contend with at home after spending the day with everyone else's moody teenagers at school. There were struggles, challenges, and lots of frustration on both our parts. I was longing for 8 to come and was a bit worried about how the end of her being 7 and the start of her being 8 were going to play out as we'd be in China during that time.

But overall, Julia's disposition in China was good for someone who didn't always like the food, someone who lost about 4 pounds so her pants were falling down and whose mother forgot to bring safety pins, someone who had to contend with airports when she was supposed to be sleeping and someone who was "the only one" (not completely true) who didn't have a Nintendo DS on the trip. She happily did her journal, took fantastic pictures, was appreciative when she got to borrow one of her travel mates' DS and told me more than once how excited she was to be in China. I sensed that perhaps the tides of disequilibrium were turning...

Julia's birthday came at the end of our first week back from China. This could have been a recipe for disaster. We were both still struggling with jet lag, and the sickness that had hit some of our travel mates finally made its way to me. I didn't have any fight left in me. But our universe was already righting itself. My now 8-year old was still okay with the fact we had agreed pre-trip that since we were going to be "celebrating" for two weeks straight, that the celebrations on the homefront were going to be low key. Equilibrium was setting in - I loved it.

Of course, our little birthday traditions would continue.

I think Julia meant to say, "Pretty old, huh?" as she did her 8-year-hand art on the b-day table cloth. Was she already coming to terms with her age - see - so easy going now -- able to laugh at herself. Love her heartfelt greeting to herself. Was she sensing a good year ahead, filled with love and harmony? I'm sure of it.

Birthday breakfast-in-bed came with a special guest this year -- Butterscotch was along for the ride up the stairs on the breakfast tray to send her bday greeting. Julia said she thought she was getting a big green cupcake for breakfast when she first saw me come into her room.
Julia's chosen outfit for the day.
What a surprize -- this 8 year old still likes the occastional "cute" outfit.
Pre-China Julia had asked if she could go to the Mandarin for her bday dinner. Post-China we were kinda Chinese-fooded out, so I suggested that perhaps some "Canadian" food was in order, like perhaps, Swiss Chalet. There was no mussing and fussing - Julia was rolling with the punches. It's great to be 8! Off we went to see Alyse and Moe for the first time since arriving home.
Even the bday cake was a bit different this year -- easy peasy, lemon squeezy -- we baked rainbow confetti cupcakes together at 5 in the morning of her birthday. Not a big cake lover, Julia was happy with the unfrosted cupcakes that we brought to the restaurant. It was quite a thing for me to see so many candles ablaze in her honour. I'm sure she was making a wish for world peace at our house.

The celebrations continued the next day in my sickness haze - luckily I only had to drive, snap the occasional photo and pay. We visited the local nail salon for manicures for the girls.
Enjoying the moment.
Finished product.
Then it was off to see Diary of a Wimpy Kid - The Movie - a chance for two 8-year-olds to do as many adults do, exclaim that the film was alright, but that--much to her mother's delight-- the book was better.
It's only been a week, but I'm already enjoying the easy days of relative peace and stability with my even-aged daughter of eight. Kids her age are supposed to be energetic and outgoing and a pleasure to be around as their behaviour evens out. She's so on track with this equilibrium thing. It definitely must be that she's now eight.
Or is it the colbalt blue Nintendo DS that she got for her birthday...hmmmmm.


5 comments:

Lianne said...

Tried posting earlier but wouldn't take! Love this post, and here's to postitive thinking that the year of equilibrium continues and also passes along to another soon-to-be 8 year old. ;-)

Jan said...

LOVE the last line in this post -- too funny!

Cheers to a new start and a wonderful year! :)

Shauna and MacLean said...

That is wonderful news and hope that the year will be one of equilibrium. Hope your year is one of relaxing and taking it easy! (heehee) I love listening and reading about your traditions as they continue to unfold and change with the times. Take care friend. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
xo

mosey (kim) said...

Equilibrium = good. She's a great girl (as they all are)! My six year old was also miffed at not having a DS on the trip (and she won't be getting one anytime soon). Thankfully, I think she's almost forgotten about it....

Happy Easter.

Barbara said...

This equilibrium thing just makes sooooo much sense explains the past year with 8 year old Rosalind and 5 ( sigh ) year old Carolina ... Carolina turns 6 in three weeks so do you suppose I get 6 months of equilbrium ??? Gotta love parenting !!! And a big but belated Happy Birthday to Julia !!!!!

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